Christie Alley

Has anyone seen her new Wizard of Oz-themed Jenny Craig commercial? She looks kinda cracked out. Not to say that she's on drugs, she just seems crazy. Which is not to say she has mental illness.

I don't know why I can't stop back-tracking and just say what's on my mind. Who am I afraid is gonna sue me? Nobody reads this blog but a bunch of stupid fucking losers with no brains. Just kidding.

See? I did it again!

All of which leads me to believe I could probably beat up any kid under the age of six.

Think about it. I'm 6'5", a tad under 200 pounds. Your average six year old is, what? 150? 175? That's like a 70 pound advantage I've got. Plus, most six year olds don't have the martial arts training that I also don't have.

On the plus side of the equation (for the kids, anyway), they are small and hard to hit. Also, they have hearts of evil and no soul. Add to that all their martial arts training and I'm clearly a goner.

So, in summation, I can beat up little kids and that's gotta be worth something in this crazy world.

Speaking of crazy, how about that new Jenny Craig commercial? And what's with her voice? Did someone punch her in the throat? Is that what she always sounds like? Hey, did you know Blossom is on that show of hers?

And what ever happened to Ted Danson? He just totally disappeared off the face of the earth, after Cheers. Same with Frasier, he should have done a show. I guess the cream always rises to the top.

Bah, this is all wasted on a bunch of idiots like you!